(This is an old post I’ve moved over from a blog I used to have. I wanted to get rid of the blog but save some of the posts. The original was posted on 12/04/2010.)
It seems far too many people I know recently are suffering horribly from that monster, jealousy. Of course we’re all subject to it; sometimes it can be justified but other times it’s downright pointless.
I see it all too often at both work and at home. Many people don’t even notice it themselves but think about it, how often do you say “Ooh that’s not fair, I wish I had that!” I’ll be it’s a lot more often than you realise. I do it myself all the time, over stupid things mainly such as an item in World of Warcraft or over a phone. Most of the time you don’t even really care all that much but just because someone has something slightly better than you, immediately we’re programmed these days to desire that upgrade. Even when you’re perfectly happy with what you have, just for an instant you might be conned into believing you want that more.
The worst is when it happens with emotions. Sometimes it’s a simple case of having your partner not being 100% attentive to you at a particular point in time, perhaps when you friend is telling you how amazing their partner is because they just surprised them with a romantic night out. All of a sudden the “huh, my boyfriend/girlfriend never does that for me, it’s not fair” thoughts kick in and you conveniently forget that actually they did a similar gesture just a couple of weeks ago.
A lot of the time it’s not even based on a fact. How about the guy you want spending time with a friend who knows how you feel and also knows that you and that guy will never be more than friends? Pretty unjustified to feel jealous of them spending time together, particularly if said friend has sworn that nothing will happen but hey, doesn’t stop us feeling jealous! Every time you hear they’ve spent time together all of a sudden worries and situations will pop into your mind and do you act on them or should you leave them alone? Is knowing or not knowing worse?
It’s easy to see the answer. Just relax and take things as they come. Take action to make things happen that you want. If you really want that phone or that guy, just go ahead and make it so. If you can’t afford that phone, get saving. If that guys isn’t interested, accept it and get over him. Some solutions are easier than others of course and I must admit that I’m terrible with getting over my own jealousy. I have just one big issue on it and it’s driving me insane recently but the main thing to remember? Don’t let it get in your way and ruin any friendships you have. It’s so often based on no facts whatsoever and not worth messing up something special for.